spoiled.

I grew up a spoiled child and when I was old enough to understand what that meant, I did everything in my power to move beyond that. When I was a teen I became anti-social, at times nihilistic and even suicidal, at the very least self destructive. As I matured, it turned into resolve to just accept what's been given to me and to try to do my best to utilize it for the benefit of others.

My mom still tries to spoil me today. I am going to go on record and say that spoiling a person is not the same as loving them.

When she does this, it sparks that deep rage in me that's ridiculously destructive. The worst part is that it can be over the smallest thing.

I'm still trying to find a way to cope with my anger. If anyone out there has suggestions, I am all ears, but be forewarned, I have tried almost everything in my power to stop it.